The warm mornings give way to even hotter afternoons. Pools are open, mosquitoes swarm, and there never seems to be enough beer. Summertime requires an attitude, a disposition of calibrated cool when even the grass won’t stay green. There are many ways to play the sanity game. For some people, its music. I have never been musically inclined myself, but many of my friends and even some family members are gifted like that. Making notes turn into songs, pulling sounds out of the clear blue sky. It is a form of relaxation and can be as spiritual as being visited by a holy prophet. Over time, this sort of meditation breeds temptation within the mind of another well-wishing hippie love monkey.

I decided I wanted in. I have strummed on a guitar, I have thumped and pounded on the drums. I, too, can be in the jam band man. Maybe I should get a cool headband? NO, no, that’s premature. Before the outfit, I need the instrument. I began searching, for what I wasn’t sure. I was looking for something stylish, classy – and above all else – cool. I want to look good when I play, I want to captivate my audience as I have always been able to do. More important than that, I want to learn how to make music. That look some people have when they play; unbridled passion mixed with quasi-orgasmic ecstasy. Give it to me, I want to feel it father!

The day finally arrived; pay day. I combed through ads on Craigslist until I found my match. She was a modest acoustic guitar, in a deep navy blue. She came with a strap and extra strings, a case and a stand. Everything in one, tailor made for me and my first venture into the musical abyss. A crisp hundred dollar bill is all it took. It was in my arms, my guitar was in my hands. What a kick-ass kind of moment, it was irreplaceable.

I was trying to bring my new girl into tune the next day, and the son of a bitch broke. The string snapped right the hell off. The second smallest one, the one that is the fifth one down the neck, it tightened too tight and snapped off with a monstrous twang. It was actually magnificent. The piece of shit that I just got off Craigslist decided it wanted to be funny, to play a very funny, funny joke on the new guy that thinks he can play. I haven’t touched the guitar since. I’m sure you can imagine we are having an unfortunate disagreement. As my new instrument and I move through grief counseling together, I realize that it won’t be easy. My musical talent won’t be brought into focus with one step. I’m not about to be the next Hendrix or Santana or Garcia. It is going to take time, and effort, to play well.

While I may not be sufficient yet at playing music, what I can do well is cook. Food is my specialty. So what I have decided to include with my piece here is a recipe, because I think that food and cooking is like the way instruments make music. Different notes, sounds and pitches can be heard, and I say even tasted. Adding fresh basil to garnish a dish gives off an intense robust flavor, adding it to the dish during the cooking process yields a more even flavor of comfort and subtlety. I want to share my talent with the world, I want to be applauded. Above all else, if I can end the day by teaching at least one person something, then I can sleep just fine.

Buon Appetito,

Daniel J. Neebes

The NAFTA

1 egg

½ of an Avacodo

1 or 2 slices of tomatoes

1 slice Canadian Bacon (or regular bacon)

Shaved Parmesan

Olive Oil

Salt & Pepper

1. Begin by heating the oven to Broil. Slice tomatoes to desired thickness, drizzle with olive oil, salt and pepper, sprinkle shaved parmesan over each slice and broil for about 2 or 3 minutes on a cookie sheet, until cheese is gold and bubbly.
2. While the tomatoes are in the broiler, fry up the bacon. Regular bacon will give off grease in the pan, save a small amount of this after you’re done cooking the bacon to fry the egg in.
3. In between frying the bacon and making the egg, take your half of avocado with the skin and pit removed, and hold it flat side down so you can get even slices when you cut. Begin to layer the dish: tomatoes on bottom, followed by the slices of bacon (egg after that, and avocado on top).
4. The last step and the most important is the egg. You make it last to make sure it is hot and fresh when you plate the dish. Cook to your liking; sunny side up, over medium, basted, or fried hard and stepped on. Your egg, your way.
5. Top the whole dish with salt and pepper, and serve. Hot Sauce is also a good flavor booster. I would also recommend a piece of toast, English muffin, or a bagel to soak up the good stuff.